Whatever Suits Ya
After 26 stores, four strip malls, seven hours, and little bit of frustration, I was able to find me an almost perfect suit. I went with the black on black on black on purpose so I could wear this suit for almost any event.
Stories of the Suit
My dudes, every Pretty Dyke needs a suit. Well... I just really wanted a suit (I'm a huge How I Met Your Mother fan, so I wanted to "suit up!" from time to time). It is unbelievably hard to find an inexpensive suit that fits well, especially because a lot of shirts that fit my torso do not fit my long-ish arms. Or vice versa, the arms will fit, but the shirt looks way too big.
I don't know a whole lot about buying suits because this is the first suit I have ever owned. I have always wanted a suit, but there was always the money thing and the people making fun of me thing, it was all just too much. This time around, I went for it and I am not disappointed.
I kid you not, I found these pants hidden behind a rack in the kid-boys section of H&M. I am not sure what came about or why I decided to look behind the rack, but I did, and it was almost like a yellow halo had shone above these pants because I was ready to give up. The tag read that the pants cost $24.99 and since I was already frustrated, I decided that this wasn't a bad price at all. My dudes, I walked up to the register, the pants were wrung up, and they only cost me $11.00! How lucky is that?! I just about fell over I was so happy.
Ok, this shirt is a men's small and it is just a little too big. I have yet to get it tailored, but I will definitely do that sometime soon. I was able to strategically tuck the shirt in and wear a suit jacket over it for the time being. This shirt came from Marshalls and cost roughly $15.00. I really liked how silky the shirt felt, so I made the decision to just buy it because I wasn't having any luck elsewhere. When I wore the jacket over the shirt, I rolled the sleeves down so the cuffs would pop out ever so slightly. When I took the jacket off, I had to roll the sleeves up so you could not tell that I had not tailored the shirt yet.
I could rant about this all day, but damn, it is so hard to find a decently sized tie for my height. I was originally looking for a skinny tie, but I could not find one anywhere. I came across this black polka-dotted tie and figured it was worth a shot. I like the look, however, the tie is just a little too long and a little too fat for my body type. Whatever, I'm shopping on a budget over here and it didn't look too bad. This tie was $12.00 and some change from Marshalls as well.
Now, this is definitely not the best picture of me in my jacket, but it is the only picture I have right now, my dudes. I was hopelessly wandering around Kohl's at 9 o'clock at night, wondering if I was going to be able to find a jacket, and then the nicest sales person came over to help me. We walked over to the kid-boys section where the options were next to nothing and we pulled the last three jackets off of the rack. I couldn't believe it, there it was, a size 14 kid-boys. I about fell over, again! I slipped the jacket on and told the sales person "I'm gonna look so goooood!" She laughed at my ridiculousness, but damn, I was so happy. I was not excited to spend $70.00 on this jacket, but damn it, it was cheaper than the $90.00 jacket I saw at Macy's and that made me smile only a little.
I very fortunately already owned these shoes. For my work, I sometimes have to look a little more dressed up for different events, so I snagged these bad boys last year at some outlet store in Portage. If I remember correctly, they only cost $20.00 and some change. That actually sounds about right because I try not to spend over $40.00 on shoes if I can help it.
And there you have it- A Pretty Dyke and her suit. It took a while to put together and I didn't think I was going to pull it off, but I am so glad I took the adventure. Now it's time to pretend I am in a How I Met Your Mother episode and head on over to my local bar hangout and sip on a glass of bourbon neat just to pretend I am cool for a night.